FREE BANANAS

I've realized that the greatest threat to Christians living in the freedom that Christ intended us to live in, isn't what most of you think. Most would say its the law. It's not. The law is easy to spot. Most Christians can detect it and most reject it. However, what most don't detect, and its the greatest threat to your joyful walk, is the MIXTURE of Law and Grace. It's harder to discern, it takes some time to detect...but once you've made the transition into grace, which only comes by revelation, you can hear it a mile away.

I was reading a book that had aspects of the gospel in it. The author is a well respected Christian minister, a reformed Calvinist in his theological position, and he unpacked the story about The Prodigal Son in a way that I've never heard it before. It was so glorious that at times I re-read sentences just to make sure that I was grasping the full extent of the love, compassion and mercy that he was expounding out of the story. He captured the grace of God in ways that would make Hyper Grace preachers nervous. I cannot explain how he unbundled the truth of the magnificence of our Father's grace, love, mercy, kindness and patience. It was marvelous. Truly marvelous. He cracked open truths about how the God of Heaven has such mercy on sinners, welcomes the degenerate, cleanses the most evil of us and accepts the worst of the worst into His loving arms. I'd never heard The Prodigal Son story like this before. It's the sort of painting an evangelist would paint of God when sharing the good news with a sinner; on how he can lay himself bare before the God of Heaven and receive forgives and cleansing. It would have made the most hardened heart soften as the character of Jesus was shared. I will most certainly "steal" some of his truths when I share the Gospel in future. How could I not share such good news?!

But then I got to the next chapter. And it went down a corridor that I'd encountered years before and then I hit a few sentences that made my inner alarm bells ring "WARNING! WARNING!". I encountered the mixture. I encountered the rules. He went about describing, and let me paraphrase but still with words he used..."Now that you're a Christian, you are hemmed in on the straight and narrow, and you better watch how you live. If you wander off to the left - WHACK! - God will smack your spiritual knuckles. And the same if you wander to the right. This road is stern, strict and precise and if you wander off, the chastisement of God will bring you back in line." My jar dropped. My heart sank. How could you have seen the Father of love in such an amazing way in one story and then conclude that He would treat his sons this way once they came home? 

It reminded me of a story I heard that so summed up this subject of mixture. There was once a man walking through the amazon jungle shouting "Free bananas! Free bananas! Free bananas!" Monkeys came from everywhere to see these free bananas. The guy tossed them bananas, left and right, behind him and in front of him, and he carried on walking. The monkeys came from everywhere and grabbed the bananas and followed him as he carried on calling out "Free bananas! Free bananas! Free bananas!" He walked into a huge metal structure and tossed the whole bag of bananas down. The monkeys followed inside and went for the bag of bananas only to hear "SLAM!" The guy had shut the gate to a giant cage. From then on the monkeys had to now pay for the bananas. 

The message of salvation has been clear - "Come to Jesus! Believe in Jesus only and have your sins forgiven. Salvation is free. Jesus already paid the price. He has made the payment for your sins, nothing you can do will earn forgiveness. Jesus paid the price. Come and receive your salvation." However, after they accept Christ and receive their "free bananas", there is an invisible SLAM behind them as now they are 'taught' how to pay for their bananas from now on. Locked into a cage of bondage for the rest of their Christian life...unless revelation comes that infact, there was never meant to be a cage. It IS free. Jesus DID pay the price. It IS for freedom that Christ has set them free. No need to pay God back for anything He has done for them. Salvation IS actually what the Bible says it is: A GIFT. Have you ever had to work for a gift? Pay someone back for a gift? Made to feel guilty for a gift? 

People who are locked into the mixture of law and grace have missed a biblical truth: HOW MUCH MORE. If while we were sinners (hated God, evil to the core, didn't desire Christ, lost in sin and loved sin) God died for us - he reached out to us and loved us SO much; HOW MUCH MORE does he actually love and extend even MORE mercy and grace to those who are now actually His children. Think about that!? Paul described this in detail in Romans 5. But people caught in the bondage of mixture think that God extends more mercy to the sinner than He does the saint. They expound marvelous truths about the grace of God to the LOST PERSON and then distort the "truth" of God's ridgidness, harshness, severity and anger towards the SAVED PERSON. (And for those who think I'm speaking against discipline as Paul describes in Hebrews; please don't assume I'm saying something that I'm actually not saying.) 

Christian, please ask the Holy Spirit for discernment. Ask Him for revelation like never before. I was once a Christian who was swimming in the mixture of law and grace. And I didn't even know it. I was zealous. I was "on fire"! But I wasn't free. I was in fact still paying for my free bananas.

The Invitation

A multi-million dollar rich business man, estranged from his son, returns from a far off land to his home town. He buys the biggest mansion, fills it with the best furniture that money can buy, adorns the cupboards with the best clothing, fills the fridges and kitchen cupboards with the finest foods and puts $1billion into the home's safe.

He then goes about inviting his son back home. His son left the family many years ago in order to do his own thing. He was rebellious and hard. The father's hope was that his son would come back to him. He sent his messenger with the invitation for his son. The invitation was simple but could only be read when he came to the house. The invitation read:

   "Son, I love you. I have always loved you. You are the world to me. I want to spend the rest of my days with you, knowing you and I want you to know me. Lets enjoy one another, travel the world together and be a family. I am not angry with you or disappointed with you. On the contrary, I am proud of you and desire good things for you. Come home. All that I have is yours. Love, Dad."

The messenger brought the son back to the father's mansion where the father hugged his son and welcomed him into his home. He walked his boy into the lounge and his son saw the extravagance with which the father had bestowed upon the house. They sat together on these big white comfy chairs as his father read to his son, the invitation.

The son listened and then considered the invitation. He stood up, shook his Dad's hand and replied 'No thanks Dad. But I don't want you or what you have to give me.' He rejected his Dad and walked out. The father was sad and wept. Each day, sitting on the patio by the pool, watching and hoping that one day, his son would come home.

God has reconciled himself to the entire world. He has provided Himself. He has provided salvation and all mankind needs. He is inviting all to come. His messengers are inviting the world to come home to their creator. Like the father who came home, God has come to the world in the person of Jesus. The temple curtain has been torn. God is now accessible to all who desire Him. He is waiting with open arms. Everything has been bought and provided. And the invitation is simple "Be reconciled to God." "Believe in the One whom He has sent." 

Dear East London Christian

East London Christian, I have a dream...

I dream of a city of Christians that live in the culture of being ONE church. They come to the realization that they are in fact ONE body that merely gathers at different addresses on Sunday mornings. 

I dream of a city of Christians that rid themselves of competitiveness. Since I've been saved, there's been this underlying, subtle and never actually admitted belief amongst us that 'my church is better that yours'. It's never actually said outright but it comes out by the little statements we make...our church is THIS big...we have THIS many worship teams now...we have expanded to THIS many ministries this year....our budget is THIS much....we had THIS many people attend our conference...our pastor was invited in THAT country to preach...the Holy Spirit did THIS amongst us....it's a competitive spirit that I'm sure you, like me, are so sick and tired of. Who the hell cares how many worship teams my church has? Who cares how big your youth group is? None of it matters.

I dream of a city of Christians who will ask themselves "How best can we love and serve the community that we're in, whether they come to my church or not or serve the Jesus I love or not! How can I make such a difference in my city, suburb and community that if we had to close down THEY would notice??!! No, not the Christians. But the unbelieving community would actually say "Flip! I sure miss those Church guys...what happened to them?" Where our motive isn't to get people to pray a sinners prayer or to evangelize them into our church programs; but to love their city and those whom they come across just because. 

I dream of a city of Christians who wouldn't be intimidated by one another's gifts or talents, but would actually feel stronger by the mere fact that the very person with that gift is actually on their team - moving in the same direction as you and with the same heart as you - they not competing for your place.

I dream of a city of Christians that wouldn't just see 'spreading the gospel' as an event or tent crusade or demonstration; but would see it as living. Caring for the lost at work, helping the lost school, smiling at the lost in the queue at the Spar, giving to the lost at any opportunity even if it is giving an extra buck to the smelly car guard or the lousy waitress who was having a bad day, praying for a gym mate that's going through a tough time at home. Spreading the Gospel is a lifestyle. It's a lifestyle of living love; its an aroma of mercy and kindness that emanates through anything I do. Some times it's sharing Bible. Most times its sharing your heart.

I dream of a city of Christians who would fall in love with their city and who would not stop crying out to God to feel for the lost in their city the way He does. 

East London Christians...my dream is for us.

LIFE...

This, by many accounts, has been the toughest year of my life. It's been humiliating, painful and testing on so many levels. No matter how I try to 'spiritualize' it, I just can't. It's just been a crap year. Let me give you a quick month by month summary of what's happened:

January - HCC suffers a split, friends and work colleagues leave. The pain, confusion and discomfort during this time and some of the most draining weeks I have experienced as my convictions and values were tried and tested. Some Friendships have never been the same since.

January - financial pinch is felt - very tight at home basically breaking even. No salary increase is possible as the company I worked for couldn't afford it.

March - SARS tells us that Mandy owes R7500 in unpaid undisclosed taxes. We challenge the decision, get R500 odd less, but still have to pay R7000 which we never had.

April - Our car, Renault Megane, suffers a mechanical problem. After diagnoses of brake pads, a service and something else - R4,800

May - Something doesn't feel right on the car - gearbox problem, clutch problem and it costs us R17,000

June - very good friends left to Jozi, Claire and Charl. Our kids were very close. It was tough.

July - Mandy and her mom in a car accident. Both taken to hospital and both suffered injuries that cost money to treat and both had pain for some time after. A very hard time, emotionally and physically for all of us. Annual medical aid savings almost drained; only half way through the year.

July - financially, we are doing really badly. We are taking knocks at every turn, no increases at work, we under huge pressure.

July - I find a new job. Comes with a company car, no increased salary so in order for it to be a 'better' option, we need to sell the Renault. To cut a long story short, because I didn't have an aircon in the car and that costs R19,000 to fix, I had to sell the car for R28,000 less than what I owed. Had to refinance the R28,000.

July - The new job was exciting but came to with its own set of pressures, time away from home in travel, around 5 nights a month.

September - Mandy parents have to leave - big thing for Mandy and our kids, no more support for her, no baby sitters, tough time for all of us. A real sense of loneliness.

September - My mom diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer and given 6 months to live. Major effect on our family and Ross especially. 

October - Michael falls ill, temperature hits 40, doesn't sleep for 5 nights, heavy on Mandy especially, and he is hospitalized. Medication costs are big.

October - geyser leaking and causes leaks in the one bedroom, dripping roof during funeral preparations. Bathroom is flooded, into the bedroom, geyser needs to be fixed - cost of over R5000

October - My mom deteriorates at an extraordinary rate and on the 23rd, she passed away. 

The irony of this is that I began a small group at the very beginning of the year called "Supernatural Lifestyle Group" whereby we were, as a group, going to press into truths and experientially trust God for signs, wonders and miracles in our lives, whether they be healing, financial, whatever, but longed to see the stuff!!!!!! (Challenging!!!!!!)

Have you ever watched the movie "The Pursuit of Happiness"? It's the most amazing story of Christopher Gardner who got hit by so many obstacles in a period of 5 years, through no crime or dishonesty of his own, that sent him right to the bottom. Separation from his wife, no job, no money and he had to take care of his little son. No matter what hit him, he carried on fighting and persevering. To him the fight was never over. A defining moment was when one night he hid with his son in a toilet cubicle in an underground subway to sleep because he had no where else to go. No shelter or welfare could look after him and his boy that night. He held his son in his arms, kept his foot on the door so tight that no one could come in and discover them, and he cried. He had hit rock bottom. 

I came to that moment in a way. Not as bad as Chris, but in a way, I felt helpless. Money was always short, sometimes not having enough to pay doctors or buy medication, credit card was maxed out on car repairs and hospital bills - not through careless spending. I felt as though life was hitting me to the ground and even when I was hit to the ground in pain, it carried on kicking me so that I stayed there and didn't bother getting up. One thing after another, one hit, one kick, after another...

The thing about life is that it is filled with facts. Whereas my life, as a son of God, is built and founded on truth. You see, facts change. All the time. The news reports the facts and those facts are changing. But truth is constant, truth never changes. You can bet you life on truth. The fact is, I'm broke. But the truth is, I'm loaded. The fact is, I'm bleeding from the exhaustion. The truth is, the joy of The Lord is my strength. 

So, I want to share some truths with some of you, who like me, feel beat down, who feel shot down, who feel like the wind has been hit out of their sails....I have some truth which you need to stand on and shout out:

You are more than a conquerer through Christ Jesus

Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world

You are the head and not the tail

The joy of The Lord is your strength

When the enemy comes in like  a flood, The Lord will raise up a standard against him

No weapon formed against you shall prosper

I walk through the fire and I shall not burn, I swim through the sea and I will not burn because The Lord thy God is with me

Life is tough. Yes. And we do go through valleys. Yes. It won't always be rosey and polka dots. The facts will change all the time. But the truth is that God is good, and He is good all the time. His mercy and favour follows me all the days of my life. Tough times is not his punishment. They're a part and parcel of this journey we call life. But it doesn't change the truth that we are His, His love for us in unchanging and that He delights in us completely. We can experience his peace that surpasses all understanding, know his supernatural love through the pain and feel his tangible grace as we walk through the fires. He will never leave you nor forsake you. He is the lifter of our heads and the lover of our souls. 

Do you know what Jesus said to his disciples? "When I return, will I find faith in the earth?" Faith isn't just a feeling of "yeah, I believe God for this and that." Faith is an unwavering, unmoving, resolute firm stand on the very words of that what God has said, he will do. No matter what comes my way! Faith is perseverance for the breakthrough. Faith is standing and even when I want to fall, I still stand. Faith IS a supernatural thing! Given by God. When you flowing in faith, you flowing in the supernatural. I might not have seen my cancer stricken mother healed, but I want to tell you God heals cancer patients! I might not have seen my bills disappear and money coming out of no where, but I want to tell you that our Father is El-Shaddai, the God of more than enough. I might not have experienced angels stopping the car that crashed into my wife, but I want to tell you that God has commanded that his angels serve us, those that are inheriting salvation, they are with us and are around us, his ministering spirits. 

There are times in our lives where we might not be winning or pressing forward, but by golly, the best we can do is stand firm and just STAND. Stand in the knowledge, that no matter how hard we get nailed, we know that our God loves us, He is with us and that we will come through it. 

Stand my friend, don't give up....STAND.

Dear Mom

Well, what can I say? One thing I can say is that life is one hell of a journey. Many ups and many downs - with lots of fun and wild adventures in between. While growing up with you as a young boy, living with you in KWT, going with you to Pretoria and then settling in East London, you and I have certainly been on some wild adventures together. My life forever moulded, my character forever shaped and my destiny given direction by your love, your influence and your strength during those times.

What can I say? In a word: A LOT. 

What words can I use to describe my mother, the one woman who has loved me unconditionally since birth...Strong. Graceful. Honest. Pancakes. Caring. Windsurfing. Firm. Morkels. Integrity. Loving. Leader. Gentle. Courageous. Soft. Resolute. I'll be here all day describing you. All I know is that you're beautiful. Inside and out. An inspiration to me. You always have been and you always will be; long into the afterlife.

I have some vivid memories and clear ones; all through out the years of growing up. Some funny ones, some scary ones, some sad ones, but mostly funny ones. 

I distinctly remember the taste of your pancakes. You always knew how to put a smile on my face - pancakes. As you grew older, the harder it became for you to bake them. I can still picture you sitting on a stool by the stove, pouring the batter in the pan, flipping them, sprinkling cinnamon and sugar and stacking them up in the warming draw. My record of 17 in a row still stands. You still make the most delicious pancakes. Ever.

When we lived in KWT, I still remember you and I sitting in the lounge of our duplex, and you were doing the times tables with me. You fought with me to turn off KTV and I argued that it wasn't a distraction. I was right on this occasion Mom, as my maths marks were always good. Yay for KTV!! 

I remember you going out late at night, still in KWT, because your store's alarm went off. I never understood the gravity of your bravery at the time. You had a torch and the store keys, venturing to into the heart of KWT's CBD with a security alarm company guy, hoping the intruders don't see you before you see them. If I think of those times now I can only say "Flip Mom, were you freaking mad??" But no, you weren't mad. You had a job. And looking after your stores was part of it. And you were always up for the challenges. The bravest and most courageous woman I know. 

You broke into the world of management in Morkels. A fraternity that belonged to white Afrikaans men. And here you were, a woman. You never seemed to be scared or intimidated; even though I'm sure you were deep down, but you never showed it. Strength and a sharp tongue was always one of your strengths. You became Arthur Flemicks' bazooka in  lot of regions. He knew you were a force to be reckoned with and so did your staff. I remember the respect you commanded from your staff - Noleen, Antoinette, Wilson....many of them were success stories because of how you believed in them, trained them and released them. It was no wonder that you, my Mom, was the first woman in the history of the Morkels company to win the annual prestigious Chairman's Award. There was an air of fear that carried when you visited your stores - not a scared fear, but a respectful "Oh shit, here she comes." Mom, did you ever see The Devil wears Prada with Meryl Streep playing the editor of a top magazine?? Watch the movie and you'll have an idea of the respect you commanded. You had this amazing ability to be firm and strong with your staff, while at the same time able to sympathize with them and understand them. That's what made you a GREAT leader. Inel and I both have that quality too Mom.

Coming from a sexually and physically abusive childhood, orphaned while still a toddler and adopted at a young age, you could have easily turned into a bitter, vengeful, nasty person who thought the world owed her something. But I never saw that. You were always prepared to work hard. You knew the value of treating people well; all people, not just the people who were good to you. You were a perfectionist, sometimes painfully so. But I saw the value in it - if I had the ability to do something well and right, then I should do it right and do it well. You drilled this mindset into me. Thank you. You even taught me to pray. I remember the one time my room was so untidy, you came in and said 'You better pray this room is clean by the time I come back.' You taught me to appreciate what I had. You bought me this mini hifi, 3 disc cd changer, once. I remember how I guarded this thing with my life. You taught me to never take things for granted and I suppose that why today I'm able work hard for the things in my life and really Appreciate them. I suppose if I was rich and everything was given to me without the sacrifice required I wouldn't have this quality. Thank you Mom.

You are an amazing woman. You always have been. Always game for a laugh, not afraid to laugh at yourself......or me :-) I will love you forever.

Your son

Ross

An Addict's Addiction

Their palms sweat. Their heartbeat rises. Sometimes their body shakes. And sometimes they perspire. "Should I? Or shouldn't I?? I don't want too. I want to not want it." they scream to themselves. Inwardly of course. It's the invisible battle. The one no one ever sees. Not their family. Not their friends. And most times, not even their spouse. Some days they're fine and have 'it' under control. Other days they could literally go mad with the craving. It tears them up inside.

If you've ever spoken to an addict. Or maybe you are one. You know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. At times you've tried to stop. You really have. But then in a few days you start up again. The cycle continues, and you're oblivious on how to stop it once and for all. Cocaine. Cigarettes. Panado. Spirits. Hustler. Heroin. Blackjack. Weed. Internet porn. Slot machine. Coffee. Beer. They say 82% of all people in the western world are addicted to something detrimental. And only 14% of those ever come to a place where they able to stop it, silence it and win. The others never know what it's like to be free.

I was an addict once. I tried all the formulas. I read books. I cried. I prayed. I read some more. And I prayed some more. For over 17 years. And then...one day...it clicked. It's like a light switched on in my heart. Not my head. My heart. I finally came to a place of believing. And it was simple, but yet totally profound, life changing...and....addiction ending. The light was this: I finally believed who I was and what had been done for me. I was no longer an addict. And my addiction no longer had power over me. I was God's son, I was made right with God by no effort on my own. And His Son had broken the power of my addiction. It no longer had power over me. I had to believe. and i did. I came to place of believing. 

Today I'm free. I'm experiencing and living out now what I believed back then. I'm not an addict and that addiction has no power over me. I'm still vulnerable. But not controlled. I can still fall. But it's power over me is broken. 

If you're an addict...know one thing. Freedom is real. It's not a pipe dream. It's not a mirage. It's indeed possible. Read the books and even pray if you like. But if you must do one thing, do this: Believe. In your heart believe. Jesus, in fact, did break sin's power over mankind and reconciled us with God. Believe it.

Freedom to you.

My conversation with a passionate atheist

I recently had some sushi with a friend of mine. He's an atheist. A vocal one. We have a great relationship in that we both are passionate lovers of life and never back down on what we believe. We both possess the ability to argue well and make our points sound like the right ones. BUT we also have the ability to agree to disagree on tough issues without them effecting our friendship. Hard to find that nowadays. And so...we had one of those conversations. Last week.

One out of three times, at our regular 'get togethers', we always end up chatting about the possibilities of life after death and God (or in his case 'god'). And so this last time it was one of those 'get togethers'. We chatted about religion, Christianity and God. As much as I try and persuade him with some really intellectual 'fact', nothing seems to move him. I share my own testimony of how Jesus found me, how Jesus changed my life and given me life. I tell of the miracles I've seen and the healings I have witnessed. I share scripture from the Bible. I plead my case in loving and gentle ways every time we get onto these topics and yet there is always this imaginary wall that my words bounce off, right back to me. I can sell just about anything to anyone, but somehow to one of my dearest friends, I can't seem to influence him to follow my best friend and Heavenly Father. No matter now sincerely I try.

But then...this last time, something happened. I sensed a crack in that wall. It may just be a slight one, but a crack nonetheless. I was straight and firm with him. "Dude, think about it." I said. "The very fact that I am sharing this with you, must show you my love for you. I'm like a guy who was trapped on the top floor of a burning building. I found the way out. I ran down and got free. I look up and see my friends and family in that same building, engulfed in flames, and I know I need to shout out to them the way out. I may be a lunatic and I may be coo-coo in my head. But the fact is, I believe this stuff with all my heart. I believe that one day we all will die. I believe that there will be a judgement before God. And only those who have received Jesus, follow Jesus and believe in Jesus will go to heaven. Hell will be real for many well intentioned good people who rejected God. The fact I'm sharing this with you must show you that you're important to me and that I love you enough to show you the way out. There is an escape route and its not in you trying to live a good life or being religious. It's you believing in a savior." 

His eyes flinched and his whole countenance changed as he soaked up my words. He could see I wasn't trying to 'sign' him up to my country club i.e. get him to be a member at a church or convert him to some religious unpractical practice. But that I was really trying to share an escape route from an eventual fiery hell.

No, he never fell to his knees and cried out to God to save him. He never collapsed in repentance and asked Jesus to remove his sins. I wish he had. But that didn't happen. He finished his drink. He smiled. And he said 'Are you paying or is it my turn?' as he gestured for the waitress to bring the bill. He never said anything then or since. But I know something happened. I saw the wince. I saw his eyes. The wall cracked for sure. 

My mandate from my Father is to love. Love ecstatically. Love without measure. Love till I can't love any more. Converting is HIS job. Mine is to love. And so I do. Everyone as much as I can. Just love. Changing hearts and convincing people of Gods love and existence is God's part. And I'm not about to take over His job. 

How's your loving going???